Australia Entry #20 - September 1st, 2025 - October 6th, 2025

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The What If…

I read a book this month called the Midnight Library by Matt Haig and it depicts the story of a woman called Nora Seed who after finding herself dissapointed with her current life gets the chance to explore alternate realities of her lives if the regrets she had were removed. It was quite a timely pickup that a few days later I found myself flying back to Poland with my dad. Both of my parents sacrificed a lot of their lives to move away from all their family and friends and out to America to try to make a better life for themselves and for me and my sister, but for the first time I was able to fully appreciate what was given up by driving my dad around Poland and seeing family and hearing about the stories of my dad growing up and my dad’s time in college and how so many things had changed. I also got to hear about old stories from my grandpa and how our family got the rural land that they own and got to hear about my grandma’s first ever job and how she met my grandpa working at a milk inspection facility. I also spent time with my dad visiting the graves of my great grandparents from my dad’s side and both grandparents from my mom’s side.

I had not been back to Poland in over 9 years when I finally flew back and it puts things into perspective that this trip was the first time I landed in Poland when I was an older age than my mom and dad where when they decided to leave it all behind to move to the US. I still often times think of the what ifs that could have been different in life if my parents didn’t decide to move across the ocean. I think of the sports teams that I wasn’t able to participate in because my parents were working and there wouldn’t have been anyone to pick me up after school. I wonder how good my English language would have been and whether or not I would have even learned it in school to a level where I would be using it regularly. I also wonder if I would have ever landed in tech, as my parents would have stayed physical education teachers and likely pushed a different kind of lifestyle growing up than I had in the US.

Though, reminiscing of the paths that could have been also makes me appreciate the things that this path through my life gave me and while it’s not yet Thanksgiving and we don’t celebrate that in Australia, I do want to just say that I’m thankful for the friends and family that I was able to spend time with growing up, the little road trips to the shore and to malls, the fun times doing whatever I was doing with the people that make my life full of warmth and happiness. I’m also thankful for my coworkers who now that I’ve been working are who I interact with the most and who fill my days with joy and excitement. It really is hard to fill life with meaning, and while I spent a lot of my time now watching shows and playing games and planning hiking trips and reading books, it really is the relationships and the life long friendships that give me the most joy to spend time nurturing.

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